expectations?! (essential for people management)

expectations?!
(I am- no writer - not authorised to make any conclusions - this is just some kind of thoughts that flow thru my very less exposed mind - this has no validity or may not hold true for other fellow readers.)

We all try to share / care and discuss/debate issues and expect something from the people who live with and around us or interact with as per varied degrees of relationship we assign them .

Actually , no one can completely share any problems/ feelings with any one ,even with husband /wife or boy/girl friend or whatever is the relation . What actually happens to us on discussing is that we ourselves start seeing the different angles of the issue when we try and talk about it – which may make the problem heavier or lighter.

Ofcourse ,the person with whom we discuss may or may not influence you with his/her attitude towards the issue- but in the end people listen to their own conclusions , rather than the other person’s.

what we feel might not be what the other feel about the same issue .At least the gravity of the issue will be different as per each mind!

Even what I write now will be seen differently by different minds .

so our problem is to a certain extend within ourself- our requirements and expectations.

Like - when we think that it is our right to get something and we dont get - it hurts

Thinking negatively- that there is no right , and we may not get it – we are prepared and there is no disappointment .

I used to do this even while i went for exams in school ; and under-project myself to even my parents – to make sure that I overtake their expectations

To get excited with what we r sure to get ... we may disown them …

Similarily - say , we expect someone to do a certain thing and they does not do it - we feel bad

Then try thinking that it is not necessary that others do what we want – they r not u - not urs - and then if they does not - it is as we expected and so no much hurt !

but then if they does it - it is above our expectations and we feel happy ,

it all depends on how much we expect -not on how much he or she does . it is within us- not within them

read them ( all around us ) by our own scale and measure them and
assign limits on what we can expect from them -reduce some 30% from that expectations ....and fix the expectation limits ...

do this with ur head not heart
and then u c , everyone is over achieving our expectations